The Glorious Stretch

A new take on the ancient Chinese myth of The Sound of The Great Bell

The Glorious Stretch = based on The Sound of the Great Bell (Has-Khieou-Tchouan:c.ix) – https://www.gutenberg.org/files/16261/16261-h/16261-h.htm

The market was in great shape and real estate was booming in Manhattan. It was 2006, that’s when the worlds best builder and part-time mafioso Roland Spade decided that the subway station under his luxurious gold adorned, marble laden, midtown penthouse apartment was just too shabby to exist within his purview. Being an older man he remembered with great joy the subway of his youth with the new mosaic tiles with their perfect symmetries and glossy finishes reflecting the most fashionable typography. Luckily there was still some convincing remnant of that by-gone era down under the street. He toiled for days trying to figure out what it was that really bothered him about the station, besides all of the people of course. He came up with his answer, it was the disgusting rat infested mud pit of broken glass and rusty iron that joined the cliff edge of the platform. 

Ahha! He figured out just what to do. Being a top building guy he had the entire city’s best minds and labor at his disposal. So, he called a meeting with his fixer (that’s a lawyer) and had him summon the cheapest law-bending regulation-breaking project manager that could be found in all of the tri-state. But then he found out that there was no tax abatement for workers from New Jersey, so he had to settle for bi-state. No biggie. He got the guy who was called Shorty and told him what was gonna happen. For the train track stretch from MOMA to 7th Avenue there would be a new type of track, a real shiny one. He said “Shorty, make me a track that’s brass, silver and gold”. Shorty said he “never heard of it” but went straight to work. 

It turns out that molding train tracks can only be done in one spot. It’s a place in Long Island City that kinda looks like it belongs in the Lord of the Rings. There is a 20 foot wide cauldron full of molten metal with an observation deck about 50 feet over it. Pretty ominous really. This is where Shorty failed badly. He mixed the metals and made the track alright but when they ran the test train over it, it shattered into a million pieces, so they had to start over. Keep in mind that there really wasn’t a budget for a good engineer or physicist or metallurgist – so basically Shorty was a self proclaimed alchemist and he decided that the reason it shattered was that he just put the metals into the lava pit in the wrong order.  

Well…It wasn’t that. After ruining three sets of the track Mr. Spade showed up at the mines of mordor job site and without a proper greeting proceeded to manhandle shorty gripping his jacket lapels while ever so politely notifying him that if he didn’t get it right the next time he would be going into the lava pot. Shorty just about said something stupid when it was heard through the plywood walls of their makeshift office the most beautiful singing. It turned Spade’s head and his eyes met the most beautiful women he had seen in at least a week or two. Gloria was her name. She was stunningly beautiful but had turned down marriage proposals from tons of guys (even a Goldman Sachs Fund Manager) to stay at home and help her father Shorty since her mother had passed away. She smiled a shy grin and said “oh sorry guys” and left quickly.

She understood that Roland Spade was gonna kill her father if he didn’t get it right and knew exactly what to do. She went to Coney Island to visit a psychic. It wasn’t a real commercial type of psychic on the boardwalk, this guy was in one of the little 6 story red brick buildings behind the Russian street. Charming really. In his darkly lit studio filled with silk fabrics, beads and incense smoke, he had a crystal ball – really! Some tarot cards, runes, an i-ching book, dominoes, dice, a lucky quarter and a bouncing rubber ball all a makeshift tablecloth of silk scarves on his little round table. There may have been other magic items, can’t be sure. Anyways, after a full reading ($50, not the cheap one) he said that the only way the metals would mix is if they were bound together by the body of a truly pure spirit. 

A few days went by and all she really did was cry. It was her father’s last attempt, and if he didn’t get it right he was dead. 

She got her plan together. She would go to the job site and when Roland came in she would sacrifice her life by pretending to be attracted to him. It would surely work. She prepared her face with 5 levels of poisonous makeup put her stiletto heals on and rushed over just at the moment when they both stood overlooking the boiling of the metals. She said “Wow, Mr. Spade, your project is just awesome!” and Roland gave a half a smile as her father grimaced, sweating with his raising up to apologize. She was really nervous but started to sing, and at that Roland went wild and couldn’t keep himself from grabbing at her. But she wasn’t expecting it so fast and lost her balance plunging over the side into the giant fiery kettle. 

Nobody knows if that was the reason the tracks from that moulding session survived the testing. But it is true that whenever a train starts to make its way out of the station you can hear Gloria’s beautiful song in the warm bowing of the rails under the train. 

By Jeremiah Bornfield